Bacon's Blurbs: Quick Humor Headlines from Q. William Bacon


Wikileaks Reveals Photos of Justin Beiber's Naked Forehead

Photos reveal that Bieber's bangs have been hiding the face of Voldemort.


At Navajo Council Meeting, Kanye West Grabs Talking Stick

West then shouted that Beyonce should be the one chosen to receive the prized necklace of wolves' teeth.


 Sell Your Junk Car -- they'll tow it, too.


Garrison Keillor to Write Erotic Novel

Mr. Keillor says, "My book will be like chicken soup for the penis."


Iranian Wildfowl Leader Denies Existence of Thanksgiving

President I'm-A-Dinner-Jad says, "It's just an excuse for American turkeys to appropriate the name of a great Islamic nation."


Race Car Driving Experiences Talk about a unique gift!


Obama Collides with a Large Hadron

President requires stitches after mishap during tour of CERN facility.


Bill Gates Wins Lucrative "Richest American" Award

Forbes Magazine's "Richest American" Award, once again goes to Microsoft founder William Gates III. As is tradition, he will be presented with a gold medal, a diploma, and a $100 million prize.


Donald Trump's Castleboat Capsizes Again

KEY WEST, Florida - "Anyone can own a houseboat," says billionaire Donald Trump. "I'm not just anyone. I own a castleboat. In fact, a replica of Bavaria's famed Neuschwanstein Castle, as a boat."


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Dick Cheney to Join Bush on Book Tour

Former president George Bush will be personally signing copies of his memoir, "Decision Points". Former VP Dick Cheney will be personally crossing out the passages that threaten national security.


Every Object in Hollywood to Get Silicone Implants

Fearing a future of 3D movies and tv shows, every prop, costume, set, and background in Hollywood thinks it needs its surface depth surgically enhanced if it wants to keep working.


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